David was kind enough to shared Jean’s story as part of our 2024 Newsletter. Thank you again to him for sharing Jean and his experiences of St John’s Hospice.
“When I think of St John’s, I think of Diane and Pippa coming to the rescue. Whether it was practical stuff or emotional reassurance, they were there. The support is massive and I needed it.
When I think of Jean there’s thousands of memories swimming round – after 57 years of marriage, two children and two grandchildren there would be! We met at Junior School. Mr Waywell told me, “Sit next to Jean: you’ll thank me in later life.” he was right. Our first kiss was at Half Moon Bay, the rest is history.
Jean was a busy woman – looking after the family, working, joining clubs, dancing, helping the Brownies and Guides, and ‘fluffing’ flowers. She was always reasonably healthy. Then the cancer diagnosis came and 18 months later we knew it couldn’t be cured. Pippa, our St John’s Clinical Nurse Specialist helped us with the advance planning because Jean wanted it all sorted out. It was comforting to both of us that everything was in place.
Jean wanted to be at home, so I looked after Jean at home for 18 months. It’s really tiring and can feel lonely but it’s what we both wanted. I couldn’t have managed without the family and St John’s. St John’s know how important it is to celebrate life events too. We wanted a family get-together for our 57th wedding anniversary. Diane bought a bottle of Prosecco to help everyone celebrate and there were hugs all round. That night I said to Jean, “Night, night, I love you”, Jean said, “I love you too” and as always, I held her hand as she went to sleep. Jean never woke up again.
There were lots of people at Jean’s funeral because she was loved by lots of people. We chose Tina Turner’s ‘Simply the Best’ because she was. To remember Jean, we had a collection for St John’s and planted six trees for her.
How am I getting on now? It just depends, one moment there’s a recollection and I laugh, another time there’s a memory and I cry. Talking to her photo helps. I still buy flowers every week, but I can’t ‘fluff’ them quite the way Jean did!
I’m still flabbergasted at the amount of work St John’s do. I used to wonder why they were always fundraising, now I know why – so many different types of care and support that we all need, and it all needs paying for.”
David Rush
You can find out more about St John’s Hospice Community Services on their pages here.